AUTHOR’S NOTE

“Counterpoint” was inspired by “the rain scene” in Chamber Music, but it slips sideways out of the episode and gives our beloved couple the opportunity to more fully explore and express their passion for one another.

“Counterpoint” has a long history, beginning as one of the first stories I wrote back in the day. It was originally published in the September 1995 issue of Barb Hill and Terrie Milliman’s CABB zine series “Soulmates”. It lingered in my files until 2008 when I revised and published it in “Remember Love”, a collection of my short stories. It went back into hibernation until about 2017 when I rewrote it to give the story a mild Adult rating and sent it to its new home in the now-archived section of the original CABB website. That was where it was meant to stay.

But somehow this one wouldn’t remain quiet. Recently I found a print copy of the story with my note “Revise again someday and make it steamier.” Someday had arrived, so that’s what I did. This reworked, still romantic but now more sensual version is absolutely the final incarnation for this story, and now it will live happily ever after at CABB New Chambers.

Just as Vincent and Catherine realize in “Counterpoint,” everyone needs to know when to move on and explore new adventures, make other discoveries. Clearly, I’ve enjoyed working on this story – over the stretch of 30+ years! – but my imagination is still filled with other BatB story ideas, and they need to be given their voice, too. I hope you will enjoy the one you’re about to read.

* * * * *

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,
while loving someone deeply gives you courage.

~ Lao Tzu

Vincent raised a glass of water to the old man’s lips with the hope the small offering would ease the pain chafing his throat. But swallowing the cool liquid made Sam flinch and Vincent frown.

“Thanks,” Sam rasped as he collapsed back onto a pile of faded pillows. “I think it helped.”

“You shouldn’t try to speak,” Vincent cautioned. “It will strain your throat. Your fever has broken, but you must try to rest now and let the medicine Father sent continue to work.”

In the dimly lit bedroom, Sam attempted a hopeful smile. “My throat doesn’t hurt so much anymore. I think I must be getting better.”  Still, a furtive flickering of his eyes from his friend’s face to the fading light beyond a gap in a pair of threadbare curtains told of unspoken anxiety and dread.

Vincent knew all too well the fear of being forced to face danger Above, and, deeper still, the soul-deadening burden of aloneness. He took the old man’s gnarled hand in a gentle grip. “Sam, please try not to worry. We all understand you want to recover safely in your own home, but you needn’t think you’ll be forgotten or left entirely on your own. I’ll stay with you now until you fall asleep, and first thing in the morning, Jamie will bring you breakfast. William said he’s making oatmeal with honey, just the way you like it.”

Sam’s shoulders trembled as he nodded his head. “You’ll remember to give Jamie the new key?”  Again, his gaze faltered, then jolted toward the gleam of metal securing the deadbolt-locked door.

“I will.” He hesitated, not wishing to put into words the cause of Sam’s unease, yet knowing it would not help to pretend he hadn’t understood. “We’ve still had no word or further sighting of Mitch. It’s been close to a year now. I don’t think he’ll return to cause you or others any harm.”

Sam closed his eyes as if in prayer, and when he opened them he knew his friend would see the regrets that still haunted him. “I wish…”

“I know…” Vincent gently squeezed the frail hand, then released his grip to smooth the rumpled blankets around Sam’s chest. “And remember if you need us, you have only to call Peter or Mr. Long, and they’ll get a message Below immediately.”

As he watched the tension slowly ease from Sam’s face, Vincent tilted his head toward the bedside phone. “And, of course, there’s always Mrs. O’Malley across the hall. I trust she’s still calling several times a day?” He waited for the expected scowl. “I’m sure she’d be more than happy to keep you company. Unless, of course, she’s finally given up on you and found someone else.”

A flurry of coughing didn’t deter Sam. “That old busybody! She’ll never give up! If she’s not calling on the phone, waking me up while I’m trying to take a nap, she’s running over here knocking on the door to pester me.” He tried to force a frown, but his lips cracked into a smile.

“Just as I thought.”  Vincent’s grin matched the cheering tone of his voice. “You won’t be alone even if you want to be. Now try and get some sleep. It will help you heal.”

“I will, but first I want to tell you how sorry I am for taking up all your time tonight.”

“Please don’t apologize. You’re part of our family. I’m happy to be able to help you.”

Sam’s heart eased, but he needed to show he understood the depth of Vincent’s selflessness. “Yeah, but when you brought Catherine to visit me last week, didn’t you two say you were going to the concert in the park tonight? Then I had to go and get sick, and you had to change your plans just to help me.” His lips tightened as he shook his head. “Don’t get me wrong – I’m grateful you’re here, but I feel real bad about making you two give up your time together.”

“Sam, none of this is your fault. Someone else could have come here, but it wouldn’t have made any difference about the concert. Catherine found she has to work tonight. There was no other choice. Her job is very important to her and to everyone she helps.”

“She does a lot of good for a lot of people, but you two don’t get much time together, do you? It’s a shame you have to miss the concert and all.”

 “Yes, it is, but it can’t be helped, so please don’t worry about it. There will be other concerts, other times.”

Sam heard the undercurrent of disappointment Vincent had tried to hide. “Maybe she’ll get out of work early, and you can still hear some of the music.”

“It would be nice, but I don’t think it’s possible.” Vincent knew Sam would persist in good-heartedly trying to bolster his hopes, but he needed the conversation to end, not only for Sam’s peace of mind but for his own. “The concerts will begin again next summer. Catherine and I will listen to some of them then.”

Sam sighed hoarsely. “Your Catherine is a real nice girl. She’s someone special.”

“Yes, she is.” A smile warmed his lips. “She is very special.”

“You know, she left her card here for me.” Sam pointed toward the bedside table. “She said I could call her anytime if I need something or if I just want someone to talk to. She’s been so nice to me even though we hardly know each other…and even after what my son did.” He sighed heavily. “I sure wish I could help you two out somehow.”

“I know you do, Sam, and I’m grateful. I’m sure Catherine is, too. But now you really need to try and get some rest.”

Vincent watched Sam’s eyelids flicker as he fought to stay awake, but soon they remained closed, and the careworn lines of his face relaxed. The medication would provide several hours of restorative peace, helping him to awaken in the morning to gradually improving health. Vincent knew he’d be able to leave soon, but he was reluctant to go until he was completely certain his old friend’s rest would continue undisturbed.

As he settled himself on an old wooden chair, his gaze turned toward the darkening night beyond the room’s single window. He had made his way to the sixth floor apartment by racing up a shadowy staircase leading from the sub-basement of the decrepit tenement. Even though he longed for the uncertain freedom he might find in a covert descent of the fire escape, he resigned himself to returning home by the safer route, but not until he was convinced Sam remained as safe and comfortable as possible.

Wishing he’d thought to bring a book or his journal, he walked with quiet footsteps to search the cramped living room but found only a few days’ accumulation of old newspapers and some tattered paperbacks with titles that did not call to him. When he returned empty-handed to his vigil, he tried to clear his mind with a few meditative practices Elizabeth had once taught him.

But as the darkness deepened outside, he thought he heard something… someone…calling to him, urging him to venture out into the night to a secret place between two disparate worlds. The siren song was one he’d heard many times before, the music echoing within him as difficult to ignore as it was desperately sought. But tonight, like so many nights, its possibilities were not to be fulfilled.

He took deep, even breaths, telling himself he must not be selfish, willing the waves of disappointment to wash away and leave him in peace. His concentration narrowed, but instead of its focus guiding him to a place of solace, it led him somewhere else, to the person who had become so much a part of him that he was aware of her always. Even when their worlds separated them, she remained a tangible presence, a whisper in each breath he took, a tender promise in every beat of his heart.

 “Catherine…” He murmured her name, warm and low with longing, needing to hear the word that defined his dreams. “Catherine, Catherine…” It was as if nothing else existed, nothing else mattered, only her, only him, together…

He shook his head hard, struggling to maintain his pledge to the old man whose troubles he had promised to ease. With a quick glance toward the bed, he was relieved to find Sam slept on undisturbed by anything he’d done. He huffed a sharp breath. It was unlike him to become so easily distracted from his responsibilities. The realization was disquieting, but it wasn’t the first occurrence and it would not be the last.

He’d thought of what he’d told Sam, hoping to reassure him the cancelled plans with Catherine were only a small disappointment, regrettable but easily faced and soon to be forgotten. Even as he’d spoken the words, he’d known they were fragile and false, powerless to ease the unending need to be with her, its intensity as unsettling as it was exhilarating.

“Catherine…” He wanted her, needed her in his arms, in his life, in a world of their own making. Always, forever. Little else mattered now, little else made any sense. His life could never be complete without her.

During the few weeks since they’d first become lovers, the bond they shared had grown much stronger. It had been difficult enough in the past to hide his ever-increasing desire for her, and all too easy to ignore the possibility she might feel an equal passion for him. To allow himself such hope had been unimaginable…until it wasn’t. And now he was beset with a new kind of torment, a desperate longing laced with elation, teased with probabilities. It was a constant companion, one whose tantalizing pain he welcomed, even as he struggled to control it.

Again, he breathed in and out, deeply, heavily, until he felt his pulse slow and his heart calm. He pushed himself to his feet and unnecessarily straightened the blankets covering Sam. He almost wished the old man would awaken and ask something of him, anything to turn his attention from the enticing agony of his own thoughts. Immediately he was ashamed of his selfishness, yet he could not help longing that he, too, might find moments of peace in dreamless sleep.

Dreams. Some that he’d cherished most had come true. Others yet to be realized were filled with deepening pleasure…and laced with lingering pain. But even so, he would never wish them away, for all his dreams now and forever would be of Catherine. Never again would he waste precious time denying their possibilities or struggling to make certain they remained mere fantasies.

Filled with restlessness, he paced to the window and pushed aside the limp curtains to stare out at the glistening city streets. Rain had begun to fall, and he sensed an undeniable need to feel the coolness of the night on his face and hands. With forcibly controlled impatience, he eased the window upwards several inches, carefully positioning his body to prevent any damp breeze from reaching the ailing man across the room.

The drizzly autumn evening seemed to offer a touch of soothing comfort for his ragged soul. Bracing his hands on the warped wooden sill, he leaned forward, drawing in deep breaths of rain-laden night air. He soon felt his innate sense of self-control descend to protect him. Yet he mourned the waning of the wildly stirring sensations he’d felt earlier, and he knew any serenity he might gain would contain more regret than gratitude.

As he straightened, he glanced at the amber fur coating the backs of his hands, glazed with a glittering of raindrops that caught and reflected errant sparkles of light. He turned them back and forth, observing the wetness gleam on the dark gold surface. Consumed by an irresistible memory, a soul-deep groan wrenched from him. He sank down hard on his knees on the worn wooden floor. Staring sightlessly into the night, he gave in to images that filled him with torment and temptation, a blending of dreams and reality too seductively sweet and too deeply desired to ignore. He would remember them always. He would relive them now.

* * *         

It was as if they were in a world of their own imagining, enclosed by hazy light swirling through the hidden chamber Below and stirring, impassioned sounds of Schubert’s “Unfinished Symphony” filtering down from Above. Side by side, cushioned on comforters and quilts, cool night breezes gently bathing them, they leaned against the tunnel wall, eyes closed, enraptured by the music.

Yet for all its haunting splendor, nothing could compare to Catherine. Resting his arm on his thigh, he turned his body so the moment he opened his eyes, he would see only her. The breathy murmured tones he treasured made him tremble. “Ahh, I love this part.”

“Yes, it’s beautiful,” he murmured, but the beauty which held him enthralled had little to do with the soaring notes of the symphony. When she sighed softly, he could no longer resist and he opened his eyes.

She’d chosen a sapphire silk dress and fanciful earrings of pearls and gold, dressing as carefully for this special evening in his world as she would for an elegant party or night at the theater in her own. He felt a surge of pleasure underscore a sense of pride and gratitude she would make such an effort just for him. The sensations wrapped him in tendrils of warmth, and he sighed softly, knowing that in the past he would have denied them, but now, somehow, it all seemed…right.

He longed to allow himself the rare freedom to savor the slender, feminine beauty of her body, yet for many moments he studied only the loveliness of her upturned face. Tilting his head to one side, his gaze traced the ivory lines and curves of her profile and lingered on her mouth, soft with a smile. He could not look away, although he felt perhaps he should. Lost in enchantment, he spoke without thinking. “What makes you smile?”

As if she’d been waiting to hear his voice, she turned towards him, and as her eyes flickered open, he felt dazzled by the light sparkling in their depths.

“This is a wonderful spot,” she began, and the words that followed, full of eagerly shared emotion, opened a floodgate within him. He told her then of moments in his life, small pieces of the long years he’d lived without her. He’d needed to reassure her, to let her know his had been far more than a bittersweet, stoically endured existence.

Her delight in supposing that for many years they’d likely listened to many of the same concerts, touched his heart even as some small part of him quietly mourned the lost hours when their lives had spiraled so close yet had remained apart. Then he told her of the stillness that would fill the small, hidden chamber when each concert ended.

Her eyes clouded and her voice was full of tears. “The stillness. Didn’t it make you feel –“

Before she could finish the question, he responded, wanting to soothe the sadness with bittersweet honesty. “Alone? Sometimes…and sometimes I found a wonderful peace in that stillness.”

Her poignant smile, immediate and full of warmth, reassured him she’d understood everything, and he wondered if he’d ever felt so seen and still so safe as he did at this moment.

She leaned back again, adrift in the music. Finding himself completely unable to turn away from her, he edged closer, just as the sound and brilliance of a sudden storm tore apart the city sky. Its power, compelling and unexpected, seemed to vibrate within him, and, he sensed, within her as well.

Her eyes opened wide, but there was only startled amazement in her voice. “Lightning?”

He smiled, his voice husky with a rumbling of amusement. “I think it was.”

Within seconds, a cloudburst dissolved the orchestral sounds and swept concert-goers from their seats, sending them scurrying for shelter as its cool, silvery drops began to splash into the secret chamber Below.

“Vincent, it’s raining!”

He immediately began to pull his cloak from his shoulders, intending to offer her shelter from the storm, but to his surprise, she shook her head and pushed it away. Laughing, she rose to her knees and leaned back, letting the rain pour over her upturned face and body.

Her impetuous actions left him confused, but the delight ringing in her laughter and shining in the wide, vibrant smile she gave him drew an answering chord and he smiled back at her, savoring her enjoyment as his own. For many moments, they shared waves of impulsive, childlike pleasure, and he was content to watch happily as she played…until suddenly he felt a deep, insistent current begin to throb within him, a force devoid of any childish innocence, and although his first instinct was to deny it, he found to his growing concern he could not.

With arms outstretched, she gathered the rain to herself. Its increasing torrent saturated her hair, turning the strands the color of dark honey. It soaked through her dress, transforming it to a length of midnight silk clinging to her body like a lover’s possessive hands. He wrenched his gaze away and tried to focus instead on the tumultuous storm Above. He felt his hands clench the folds of his cloak and he gripped the damp fabric in tight, painful fists so he would not reach for her instead. He closed his eyes tight and tried to find safety in darkness.

But all his well-intentioned efforts were useless. He could not surrender the allure of that erotic vision to his ferocious self-control. The seduction of sound overtook him, and he was lost, drawn to her by the music of her laughter. It became a wild melody, undulating with the storm, filling him with temptation and torment, flooding over the barriers he’d designed to hold back powerful feelings that unnerved him. His heart began to race, drumming a frenzied beat within the straining muscles of his chest, sending a power pulsating the length and breadth of him, until it centered low in his body in an overwhelming rush of heat and hardness.

Submerged in fear and frustration, he forced himself to open his eyes, then felt a rush of gratitude to find her so caught up in other pleasures of the storm-filled night, she seemed completely unaware of his turmoil. It was far from the first time he’d known such pure and uncompromising need and desire for her, but always, he believed, he’d hidden everything, forcing himself to move away from her touch, to quickly end an embrace, to rigidly suppress their bond. The terror that to act on his impulses would destroy her trust in the safety and surety of his love had always empowered him to retreat into shadows.

Just as he had countless times before, he took low, measured breaths to summon the dominance of lifelong restraint, trusting it would smother the relentless force of his consuming desire for every part of her. Slowly, thankfully, he felt his self-control return, and in relief he offered her a smile to reflect the constant, more tranquil joy he always found simply by having her near. He sighed softly, knowing he had kept them both safe from himself.

But in a heartbeat, the moments of respite were swept away, as with an elated cry, she flung herself into his instinctively outstretched arms. Her smiling, upturned face told him she, too, continued to find wonder and delight in this extraordinary night. Shock at her impulsive action helped maintain his hard-won restraint, but as her lithe body moved upon him, what might have remained sweet and simple pleasure began to transform to something more. He knew he should stop her, stop himself, but when her arms clung to his neck and shoulders, he could not resist cradling her closer, even as he felt himself begin to yield to urgent wanting.

Never had there been such intimacy in their embrace; never had he allowed it, even though the unspoken need had filled them both. It was a wondrous moment, and, believing it might never come again, he vowed nothing, not even he would be allowed to destroy it. Yet even as he dared revel in the pleasure of such an unexpected gift, he could not ignore words of warning. You must not touch her like this – you must let her go – you must not – you cannot!

The relentless demands thundered through him, but this time he refused to give in to their insistence. He pulled her tighter into his embrace, savoring sensations evoked by her murmuring sighs and the delicious pressure of her body as she nestled against him. Don’t let it end, he begged in a prayer of quiet desperation. Please, not now, not yet.

To his surprise, he found he could simply hold his beloved and curtail his wishes for anything more. The realization she had wanted this to happen, that without a tremor of fear or doubt she had brought about such a wildly unanticipated interlude, filled him with quiet joy. It was almost too much to comprehend, but he gave in to it all with surprising ease, allowing himself – for once, for now – to be filled with pure contentment. And together they drifted on moments of hushed pleasure.

But for them, such tranquility could not last, and when she raised her head from his chest and looked into his eyes, everything changed. All soothing waves of serenity transformed to a crashing, driving heat that flared through him, and, he was certain, through her. Flames sparked everywhere their bodies touched, as if the lightning still jolting the sky crackled and burst within them. The image burned him, sent shudders through him, but nothing could stop the force of their shared, driving need.

He tried to pull away, but his body had been waiting for the moment he dared let down his guard, and it took command of him once more, freeing everything that had masqueraded behind a gentler guise. He could feel every soft curve as she pressed closer still, and he could not resist deepening their embrace even further. He spread his fingers wide to hold her more tightly, and the wet silk of her dress became an irresistible enticement. He rubbed his hands over the fragile fabric from her shoulders to her hips and imagined the delicate texture he felt might match the still unknown sensation of her sleek, bare skin against his work-roughened palms.

She gasped in delight as he caressed her, and the seductive sound enticed him further. Her soft lips parted, inviting his kiss. Racing toward a place beyond thought, he lowered his mouth to hers, drawing in the sweet heat of her breath as he adored her with his lips and tongue. He was lost in the sensation of her mouth moving eagerly with his, in the sound of her soft moans of pleasure. The very taste of her defined passion, and he wanted to drown in it.

Deliciously breathless, he raised his head and gazed down into the smoky heat of her half-closed eyes. He inhaled deeply, trying to still his ragged breathing, but the faint evocative fragrance surrounding them clouded his attempts to sustain self-control he no longer truly wanted. Her hands urged him back to her. She pressed herself tighter and closer, inviting him to plunge deeper into their shared sensual dream.

Every part of him responded to her. He felt it all in the pounding of his heart, the harshness of his labored breathing, the hardening of his body. She murmured his name, low and urgent, offering more, demanding everything, and it was this seductive summons that jolted him away from the world they sought and back to the world in which they still existed. In one heartbreaking instant, he knew these magical moments must end, and when his inner voice of reason cried out to him again – no more, no more – he knew he must yield to its commands.

He forced his hands to grasp her shoulders with careful firmness, to ease her body away from his, to show her what had to be. Later, he would remember how she’d trembled and for a long, heart-wrenching moment clung to him, until with a small, despairing cry, she’d let him gently but relentlessly push her away. A deep groan, like shuddering thunder, had echoed through the chamber, a sound torn from his heart.

He could not completely recall the words they’d spoken then, but he knew they had been inconsequential, an attempt to regain the easy contentment they’d shared earlier before the rainstorm. He had risen and offered his hand to her, telling her without words the decision to end their unexpected interlude would not be revoked.

He’d needed time apart from her, a chance to reflect on all that had happened without the fiery distraction of having her near. To him their shared passion, while filled with firelight, was still scarred by shadows. Had they expressed their feelings completely, she would have been forced into an irrevocable commitment to him, one he refused to allow for her own good. His conviction was resolute; the life she was born to was the only one she must lead, even though it would someday take her away from him. Their inevitable parting would be filled with unimaginable pain, but if they had given themselves completely to one another, the agony of loss would be impossible to bear.

It was a risk he could not take, even if it meant denying one of their most precious dreams. They would cherish whatever time together still remained, and he would do nothing more that might destroy what they had. If someday he was left with only memories and regrets, he would have to find a way to endure until death, a moment he might welcome, for without her in his life, there could no longer be any life for him at all.

He knew she did not share his decision about their future, but even that could not sway him. While he longed to believe he was wrong, a lifetime of restraint dug its claws in deep, and he was unsure he was strong enough to break their grip. Still, he ached with the need to know what she was feeling at this moment, and he slowly, cautiously opened his heart to their bond. When he did, he was not at all surprised to find she shared the flames that still burned within him, ones she had felt forced to smother.

His gratitude she had again acquiesced to his restrictions was shredded with the bite of disappointment. He wanted to tell her he knew how she felt, that he secretly shared and rejoiced in every bit of it. But that would only give her another promise he could not keep, and he turned away from what they both longed for.

As they’d walked hand in hand through the tunnels, sometimes in slow, easy silence and sometimes in quiet conversation, he almost managed to convince himself all was well, all was as it should be, as it must be. By the time they reached the threshold, the passionate interlude they’d shared seemed more the substance of his heated dreams than any form of reality.

They paused and faced each other, entirely unwilling to let the evening end, to watch its magic dissolve into nothing more than dreamlike memories and unfulfilled promises. Attempting to hold back the inevitable moment of parting, he told her how much it meant to him that a part of his world had become something special for her as well.

“I wanted to share this place with you.” He knew he was still playing with fire, cupping flames in the palm of his hand, exhaling heat in the husky timbre of his voice. It seemed as if all the warnings, all the doubts, so vivid only minutes earlier, had become shrouded in smoke, and he welcomed this loosening of his restraint, knowing without a doubt she’d heard his wish to share so much more with her.

Her fingers tightened their hold on his and she swayed closer. In her eyes he found the offering he’d seen so many times before yet had always chosen to refuse, and in his heart he had no choice but to accept the truth. The desire he’d always fought so hard to hide, convincing himself it was his own dangerous secret, had never belonged to him alone. She had always reveled in his desire for her. She had welcomed every spark of the fire and fury of his love, for they matched a consuming need of her own, an equally deep and abiding desire for everything he was, everything they would be together.

He yearned to accept this facet of their love as a gift, powerful and beautiful, and to give it all to her in return. But still he hesitated, full of conflict and confusion. Would doing so open doors to a world of joy and fulfillment they would share, or would it lead to prisons of isolation and darkness they’d be forced to suffer alone?

The answers he craved came in the gentle pull of her hands from his grasp, in the tender stroking of his face, in the burrowing of her eager fingers through the damp, heavy fall of his hair. He leaned closer and lowered his mouth toward hers, their kisses blending belief while denying defeat. Without words they told one another the way ahead would still be filled with risks, but they would face and overcome each one together. There was no longer any other way.

Nearly overpowered by the force of their shared feelings, he suppressed a low moan of longing against the tender flesh of her neck. So much had happened so quickly, and no matter how wondrous it all had been, he could bear little more. Another time, another place, he promised himself. This is enough…for now…

But as he raised his head, she only held him tighter, and he felt her warm, soft mouth pressed to his throat. His pulse raced and throbbed against her lips, a devastatingly erotic joining that could quickly and completely consume them. This dream within a dream must end. He eased away from their embrace and looked down at her once last time, telling her with his eyes all the things he felt he could not yet say aloud.

When he’d let her walk away, it was with a promise to meet again in a week’s time for another concert in their secret chamber. Their final words – a question voiced within a hopeful comment, a response given with restrained eagerness – underscored their need for the constancy a life together could offer, their understanding that perhaps it would all come to be.

He’d wandered the tunnels afterward, pausing more than once, deeply tempted to return to her. The truth of their shared desire had been acknowledged, and even while suffused with lingering restraint, it had taken on a power greater than he had ever thought possible. Everything had changed, had made him begin to reject his long-held belief in worlds that could never intertwine, destinies that could not be united, futures that would not be realized.

How can it be that I’ve been wrong all this time? Everything tells me there truly are possibilities for us, that our dreams can transform to reality. Can this really happen? I think…I wish… He exhaled a deep, cleansing sigh. I know…  

He’d returned to their secret place, intending to gather up the sodden quilts and comforters for cleaning, when the force of her emotions cascaded through their bond. She was still thinking of him, aching only for him with a desperate longing she could not begin to control. He stood immobile, his body half-turned, aching to race to her, and it took every bit of the strength he possessed to refuse her passionate plea, knowing it was all too intense and still too soon.

He needed solitude to contemplate the evening’s miraculous events and all the possibilities that seemed to truly await them. He gathered his burden, then forced himself to take a single step away from the path that would lead him to her, then another and another until he moved with long, driven strides through twisting passageways, hoping desperately to outrun the heat of his blood and the flames of the bond.

Full of equal measures of conflicting hope and uncertainty, he had stayed apart from her for several days since their night of rain and wonder. Her barely concealed yearning for him continued to resonate through their bond, and his desire for her underscored every note. He wondered if she sensed his longing as he did hers. And when he let himself admit he knew she did, he chose not to conceal his feelings as he’d done so many times before. It was far too late for pretending. Now there was only room for truth.

Each night they remained apart, he spent long hours examining every long-held restriction, trying to determine if any might still be valid. If he truly loved her, wouldn’t he push her away, make her accept the gift of freedom she deserved? Wouldn’t he rejoice to see her live the life she was meant to have? The questions continued, but with each repetition, their voices grew fainter. He already knew the answers. She had chosen the future she wanted. She had chosen a life with him. And if she believed hers was the right choice, how could he continue to deny and doubt her?

In the end, it was all so simple. The waiting, while torturous, gave him strength to continue accepting new truths, new beliefs. As each minute, each hour ticked by, his courage grew, as did his trust in the possibility of joy. And on a night he would always remember with ecstatic wonder, she had come Below once again and banished the final ghosts of his doubts and fears. With pledges of body and soul finally fulfilled, they belonged to each other in every way, knowing that at last their lives were evolving as they were truly meant to be.

* **          

In the apartment’s stillness, Vincent rose to his feet, slowly emerging from a world of dreams and memories. Again, he stared out into the night and almost believed he could hear the sounds of violins and cellos, their voices separate yet inextricably connected. Tonight, the orchestra would play the third of the Brandenburg Concertos. It was his favorite, the haunting, vibrant music he’d anticipated sharing with his beloved.

He’d always savored the concerto’s intricate design, an interweaving and balance of sounds whose full beauty could be realized only when played in harmony. Beyond all else, it was this counterpoint, the soaring passage of two melodies drawn together for a single purpose, which created unity and fulfillment. Had they heard the music together this night, it would have resonated within their bond-song.

He sighed heavily and reached for a note he’d saved in the pocket of his chambray shirt. Although its words had been painfully memorized hours earlier, he could not resist reading them again. In silence, he scanned the lines and heard the sweet, sad voice of their writer.

Dearest Vincent,

I’m so sorry! I won’t be able to meet you tonight for the concert after all. Joe planned to attend a reception for the mayor as the representative from our office, but now he can’t go – something about tickets for a game he doesn’t want to miss — and he asked me to be his replacement. I tried to find someone else, but no one is willing to fill in, so I have no other choice. It starts at eight, and even if I can manage to leave early, it will still be too late to come Below before the concert ends.

I know you understand, but that doesn’t make this any easier, does it? I wish I didn’t have to spoil our plans. If only there were another choice, but there just isn’t. Sometimes it really does seem as if our worlds are doing everything they can to keep us apart, and there’s so little we can do about it.

I really believed things would be different for us now. All I’ve thought about is that soon I would see you and hold you in my arms, but all we can do is watch the waiting begin again. Vincent, do you believe it will ever end?

I’ll be thinking of you tonight, as I always do, longing for the time we can be together.

With all my love,

Catherine

As he folded the note away, he heard its message echo over and over. Worlds forced apart, a yielding to the needs and demands of others, a surrendering of their own dreams and desires. “When,” he murmured, “when will it ever end?”

Sometimes their sacrifices had been made through necessity or kindness, willingly given to help someone in need. But there had been far too many times when the distractions provided by others had become a convenient way to divert the facing of truths, both bright and dark, about their relationship. And tonight was one more instance in a very long history.

He understood how much she’d wanted to refuse Joe’s unreasonable request and instead keep her promise to him. She could have done just that, but she hadn’t, although he suspected she’d done so in the past. Why then, he wondered, had she made a different decision tonight?

He knew the obvious answer to his own question. Even now after all that had recently happened, she still gave in to the habitual behaviors he had not yet shed. Since the beginning, she had been open and honest about her feelings for him, while he remained guarded and uncertain. She’d urged him to move forward; he’d hesitated and retreated. She’d tried to show him in her actions, tell him with her words, but after being rebuffed time and again, she’d adopted a resignation of patience sustained by respect for his feelings. He’d been grateful, but now he could see how ingrained it had become and how it had led to a place they were finding difficult to escape.

Fragments of cherished memories arrayed themselves like a mosaic in his mind, and while he once might have chosen to see only what he wished to see, now he could not ignore the truth they had always shown.

Catherine grasping his hand and begging him to stay with her on the terrace of her apartment until the morning light. Catherine helping to take him home, bloody and beaten, vowing she would never give up, never abandon him. Catherine speaking of the warm and lovely dream she’d had of him and the simple shared pleasures of sunshine and ice cream. Catherine risking her life to save his, telling him she had done so not through courage but for love.

And what had he done in response? Nothing other than to gather to his heart the miracle of her love, while continuing to hold her apart and away from himself and his world. Not so long ago, they’d pledged that what they had was worth everything. But to simply hold a treasure in his hands, to gaze at it longingly, and then put it away safe and untouched, turned something of inestimable value to little more than a dusty keepsake.

Catherine was so much more than just the dream he never thought would become real. She was truth and love, only waiting for him to overcome the last of his fears and welcome her completely into his arms and his life forever. Her love was all he’d ever wanted, but still he slammed shut doors, rebricked walls, turned his back on what was already his. Once it had all seemed for the best, but now it no longer made any sense at all.

He flinched in disgust thinking of the message he’d sent her in return, a spineless litany – yes,  she must fulfill the responsibilities of her job; he was fine about taking Cullen’s turn to tend to Sam; they could wait to be together some other night, some other time. He had told himself he meant to be supportive and understanding, but now he wished with all his heart he had done things differently.

Why am I still so quick to accept the restrictions our worlds place upon us, to give in to disruptions and distractions like these that can be easily avoided? Are my fears still so great I would sacrifice everything to them? How can I do this when a life with Catherine – everything we’ve both desired – is finally within our reach?

He began to pace the length of the narrow room, consumed by self-examination’s brutal honesty. As minutes passed, his tumbling thoughts slowed and synthesized into a seamless, undeniable truth.

There is no longer any reason to doubt, to welcome chances to hide from what is real. We’ve shown each other how we feel, what we want. I am no longer afraid…and she never was. Why then are we still allowing ourselves to be kept apart?

He shook his head hard. Tonight was just one more link in an endless looping chain. Stale stories of separate lives still to be led, duties to be upheld, perhaps someday arriving at the nebulous place and time when they’d finally realize all their dreams. It was all so noble, all so safe, and all so wrong. Tonight he should have told her the truth, that they must finally trade compromise for commitment, fulfill promises with passion, replace what could be with what will be.

Tears burned his eyes. She has only wanted to love me, to help me find a way to be free to love her in return, yet I’ve turned her away so many times. We are fully committed to each other, to love we now share in every way. But have I finally exhausted her will, made it all too easy to surrender, as I have, instead of continuing to move forward?

Her note seemed to push against his heart. He’d deluded himself into ignoring the plea in every word. He’d pretended not to hear her asking him to agree she should refuse the demands of others and take something just for them. Had he replied differently, he might have shown her he shared her courage. But he had not.

That night in the park, she said our love is worth everything. And it is…it is. That moment should have been our beginning, but…

A horrifying vision shuddered before him. Long years of mere existence, dark and empty and cold. A life without her. Its bleak hopelessness nearly broke his heart. What a fool I’ve been! This cannot continue. I must change the path I’ve set us on. And I will find a way, no matter what it takes.

“We have sacrificed much, Catherine,” he whispered, “in the name of love when in truth it was fear, my fear and doubt I forced upon you. But the time for that is over. You’ve always possessed the courage, the faith, and now so do I.”

He closed his eyes as if to mark the passing of a season in his singular and remarkable life, and when he opened them again, he felt them burn with purpose. He would tell her everything he’d finally come to understand. He would beg her forgiveness for what he’d done, what he’d compelled her to do. He would revel in the happiness and relief she would feel when he proved all his doubts and fears and mistaken beliefs would be laid to rest forever. And if the first steps might be small, they would not falter.

Faint strains of music from someone’s radio drifted through the half-closed window, reminding him of all they’d hoped the night would hold and how their dreams had been damaged once again.

“No more!” His voice was strong and steely. “It will not happen again. Starting now, things will be different for us.”

Unwilling and unable to wait another minute to fulfill his vow, he sought a means to give substance to his promise. Glancing at the battered clock on Sam’s dresser, he noted the hour – just minutes past seven – and then his gaze shifted to the bedside table. A spark of inspiration flared within him, and he knew he had found his answer. He smiled, amused that a small mundane object might be the key to open doors left locked for far too long.

He neared Sam’s side, and after assuring himself his friend remained deeply asleep, he sat on the edge of the nearby chair. In less than a minute, he had composed a message he hoped would deliver the direction of their shared destiny into their own hands.

As he began to enact his plan, Catherine slammed the door to her apartment and heaved her jacket, keys, and briefcase onto the cushions of the closest couch. She pulled off one high-heeled pump and flung it across the room, soon followed by its mate. But her frustration, driven by the increasingly frequent demands of others, was not soothed, and at some other time, she might have laughed at herself for such petulant behavior. Tonight, however, she was in no mood to be reasonable.

She still needed another target and in seconds she found it — the newly purchased PhoneMate sitting on an end table. Its red blinking light blared a summons as unavoidable as any subpoena issued from the DA’s Office, but that didn’t mean she had to accept it. She stood with one finger poised over the delete button, determined to exert control over at least these small intrusions. But then she yielded to her better judgment.

Gritting her teeth, she listened to a reminder from her dentist’s office, a request from the Metropolitan Opera’s latest fundraising drive, and a pitch from a telemarketer selling Caribbean time shares. Her finger inched closer, but the message counter indicated only three more, so she braced for a further jump in her blood pressure and carried on.

In moments, she felt herself grow calmer with a message from her father about next Sunday’s brunch with Peter and a call from Jenny suggesting a movie and dinner later in the week. Only one more…  But as she heard the overly cheerful voice, and her tentative composure shattered, and with each uttered syllable her temper flared higher.

Hi, Radcliffe – you there? No? Well, I’m just calling to remind you about the reception for the mayor tonight. Since I was tied up with the Ferrelli case in Brooklyn all day, I didn’t have a chance to call you at the office, so I figured I’d better do it now. You didn’t forget about going, did you? I know this shindig really isn’t that big a deal, but someone from our staff should show up.

And I’ve got to tell you, in all honesty, I feel pretty guilty I forced you into this. The game got cancelled, so I got home earlier than expected and I guess I really could’ve gone myself after all. But I’m pretty beat and, hey, they’d rather see your face than mine! It’s already – let’s see – ten after seven, so if you’re listening to this message instead of picking up, you’d better get moving. Don’t be late for this one, Cathy! I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow morning – and thanks – I owe you one.

Her ragged breathing forced a harsh pulsing of air through clenched teeth. She jabbed her finger onto the erase button, but the satisfaction in obliterating Joe’s message was not enough. During the first few seconds she’d heard his voice, she’d hoped he’d been calling to say he’d changed his mind and would free her from the request she’d felt compelled to accept. But she had been foolish to hope.

With a deep sigh, she glanced at the watch on her wrist. Not far away in the bandshell in the park, musicians would be readying themselves for the last performance of the season. She should be descending the ladder, knowing Vincent would be waiting for her. He would have sensed her eager anticipation blending with his, thrumming through their bond like the concerto’s first vibrant notes soon soaring into the autumn night.

Tears trembled on her lashes, but she wiped them away, determined not to dissolve in self-pity. This was just one more obstacle their worlds had thrown in their path, and, like so many others, they simply would have to overcome it. But in her heart she’d begun to question if they’d ever surmount them all. She would never give up, nor would he, but it was exhausting when it seemed as if everywhere they turned, they were faced with yet another challenge. There were just so many – the multiple responsibilities of their lives, the incompatibility of Above and Below, his still lingering doubts and fears, her inability to find a way to finally vanquish them.

I’ve tried over and over again to prove to him I’ve made my choice – my destiny, my life is meant to be with him. He wants to believe it, but even now that we’ve become lovers, there’s still something holding him back. I know we share the same dreams…but how can I help him change them into our reality?

She sighed again. There was nothing more to be done tonight, and again she must look with hope toward future days, holding onto trust in that elusive somewhere, someday… But it would all have to wait. She took another look at her watch. “Oh, great – it’s already seven-fifteen, and I have to leave in half an hour. I’ll never make it!”

She spun toward her bedroom and then came to an abrupt stop as the phone shouted a new command for her attention. She stomped toward the sound and switched off the volume just before the latest intrusive caller’s voice made its demands. Watching the red light gleam as the muted voicemail function began, she muttered, “Whoever you are, you’ll just have to wait!” Then she headed toward a fast shower, dismissing all thoughts of the unknown caller from her mind.

She welcomed the force of the shower’s heated spray stinging her scalp and skin, wishing it could reach within and wear away the sadness in her heart. Her eyes burned with fresh tears and this time she did nothing to stop them. Leaning against the slick tiles of the shower wall, she pressed her head against her arms and gave in to shuddering sobs.

Just when everything seems to be coming together for us, we’re still constantly torn apart. We never find time to talk about it…or maybe we choose not to. Even though I love him, and I know he loves me, we can’t go on like this.

She drew in a ragged breath. Why can’t we be together like other people, other lovers? I thought now things would be different for us, but they’re not. And they won’t be until we find a way to change our lives. He only wants what’s best for me. But why can’t he accept that it’s him?

She raised her head and felt her tears mix with the cascading water. The sensation on her skin recalled a recent night far different from this one. It had been two weeks after the evening filled with storm-swept music and passion in their hidden chamber…

She had run through the park, trying to outrace another sudden storm overtaking the early evening sky. But she could not escape heavy, pelting drops that quickly soaked through her clothing as she scrambled down the slippery grass slope. Nearly out of breath, she’d tumbled into Vincent’s arms at the tunnel threshold just as the first rumbles of thunder and jagged spears of lightning quaked the sky. With an evocative gasp of playful laughter, she’d looked up at him, only to find not the quirk of a smile but a heavy-lidded gaze of sheer sensuality.

They’d held each other close, then closer still, reveling in the fusion of her softness to his hard- muscled strength, the paired pounding of their hearts, the rushing awareness of a force that might soon overtake them. The storm’s surging energy seemed to channel through their bond, hurtling them toward the moment its power could no longer be contained.

She’d trembled as he held and caressed her, stroking his hands along the length of her back as if the damp clothing she wore had vanished. He’d clasped her waist to hold her tighter, then moaned softly as he curved his hips closer. His breathing grew harsh, uneven, confessing without words his inability, his unwillingness to let her go.

A deep, pulsing heat suffused her entire body, and she rose up to press into his provocative heat. Mesmerized by every moment, still she’d feared he would soon bring it all to an end, leaving them again with unrealized wishes, unfulfilled desires, unending regret. She was uncertain if she’d whispered the words aloud – Not now! Not yet! – but he’d somehow heard them, and at last her prayers were answered.

As he’d lowered his eager mouth to hers, a furious roar of thunder startled them to awareness of their precarious place at the edge of a storm. Jolted apart, he’d grabbed her hand and, without a word, pulled her to shelter beyond the tunnel’s threshold. They paused only long enough to share the briefest look, an avowal that held no shadow of hesitant doubt, then he tightened his hold on her as they strode to the secret door which would open to a world both familiar and new.

In her apartment, she turned under the shower’s spray and tilted her head back, feeling a sensuous smile curve her lips as she remembered with intense clarity the hours that had followed, when at last they had become lovers in every sense of the word.

The erotic energy that had enthralled them Above was undiminished as they journeyed through tunnels they’d wandered countless times before and others defining a path they’d never taken. Torch light became sparse, leaving shadows stretching between pools of light; pipe messages faded, then vanished. After swerving around curves in a narrow, stone-floored passageway, he slowed their frantic pace at a carved opening in the rocky wall.

“Where are we?” Her voice seemed to float on a rippling of air coming from somewhere in the darkness ahead.

He released her hand and murmured, “Wait here,” before blending into the shadows. In the silence, she heard the hiss of sparked flames, watched the shadows recede, and then trembled at the sight of him returning to her. The sudden glow in the darkness gilded his blond bronze hair like a halo, glinted in the cobalt of his eyes like hidden night stars. Again, he reached for her hand, again he bade her follow. “Come with me.”

Firelight from a pair of wall torches glimmered on the surface of a lake and glistened on the sparkling crystalline sand at their feet. She gasped at the sight that seemed conjured from a fairytale. “It’s so beautiful! I’ve never seen anything like this anywhere.” She watched his mouth curve in the slow smile she loved so much.

“Few people ever find their way here, so it has become a special sanctuary for me. I had begun to think of it as somewhere dreams might come true.”

His voice deepened to a raspy murmur that left her breathless, each word fluttering her heart.

“I’ve wanted to share this place with you,” he told her, and she knew he’d intentionally echoed the words he’d said on that other storm-swept night. Then he whispered those she’d sensed he’d longed to say. “To make those dreams become real…to share everything with you…”’

She hoped he’d hear her reply in her trembling voice, see it in the smile she offered. “We’ve dreamed the same dreams.”

Their bond pulsed and sang. There was no further need for words or waiting.

He spun his cloak from his shoulders and spread it on the glimmering sand. Averting his gaze from her, he unlaced his vest and threw it aside, then swiftly untied his cambric shirt, pulled it over his head, and dropped it to the ground. He gasped when he heard the catch in her breath, sensed the racing of her heart, but he did not hesitate. He removed his boots, then unbuttoned his faded jeans to roughly tug them down over the tensed muscles of his legs.

He kicked the final garment aside and for the briefest of moments stood statue-still before sinking to his knees on the unfurled cloak. Only then did he raise his eyes and hold out his hands to her, hands she was certain no longer trembled in fear but with intensity born of control and conviction. The hands she’d called hers, the hands he at last was willing to offer as hers to keep.

So entranced by the image she had despaired of ever truly seeing, at first she could not move, could barely breathe. She had dreamed of this moment for so long, only to find its reality surpassed even her most sensual imaginings. He was perfect. He was everything.

She could almost feel her gaze touching him, caressing him. Planes of rock-hard muscles, lushness of soft, smooth hair, masculine beauty the most gifted sculptor could only dream of creating. How, she wondered, has he ever seen himself as anything less? How could he not know?

And, she continued with a grin, why am I wasting time standing here asking questions?!  

Through her heightened awareness of their bond, sudden ripples disrupted her reverie, and she realized he had begun to misinterpret her silence. She reached for the hands he still held out to her. “You are so beautiful, Vincent, more beautiful than I could have ever imagined.” She watched relief and renewal soften the tension in his face and body. “I love you. I will always love you.”

He brought their clasped hands to his lips and murmured words and kisses. “As I love you, Catherine, now, forever.”

Part of her longed for them to stay as they were …and part of her didn’t. She gently pulled her hands away and peeled off her rain-damp jacket. After tossing it near the heap of his clothing, she quickly unzipped and shrugged out of her dress to let it fall to her feet on the sandy ground. In her fantasies, she’d often imagined a sweet, slow seduction, candlelight and roses, whispers and sighs, hands at once eager and shy reaching for her, undressing her at first hesitantly and then with growing abandon.

A soft, secret smile glowed as she toed off her shoes, then swiftly unfastened her lacy bra and wriggled out of her panties. There would be other times for those dreams to come true. All she wanted and needed now was the reality of him just as he was, waiting and ready for her, about to let them journey into a world they’d both longed for and had found at last in this secret cavern where he’d so often dreamt of her.

Banishing thought, she fell into his outstretched arms and gazed deep into his eyes, then tumbled onto her back, pulling him forward to cover her body with his hard yet gentle strength. Long-awaited sensations overwhelmed them, and for just a moment they had lain motionless but for the pounding of their hearts, until the intense desire of one soulmate for the other drove them forward. Savoring each caress, each kiss, each breathless word of love, they were set free to explore and discover, to taste and touch, to offer and take what they’d once denied themselves and each other.

They reveled in a world of discovery, delighted in the reveal of reality. Hands no longer trembled but stroked with delicious insistence. Silken ivory skin pressed to golden soft fur. His rough-textured palms matched, caress for caress, her smooth small hands. Mouths tasted, arms clasped, hips thrust. Deep moans, sharp gasps, heated breaths blended and became one seductive melody. Her softness welcomed him in, his hardness filled her. They moved together deeper, tighter, in a rhythm belonging to lovers throughout time, a destiny at last claimed as their own.

He vanished the faded memories of lovers she had known before, surpassed every fiery fantasy she’d had of him. She embodied all his long-denied dreams, transcended every hidden hope. Together they gloried in a soul-stirring melding of desire and devotion, an ecstatic joining of heart and body that both defined and surpassed all their dreams.

At last, they’d fallen asleep, wrapped in an inseparable embrace, soothed in the knowledge they were exactly where they were meant to be, safe in each other’s arms, finally free to love in all ways, now and forever. Later, they’d awakened to make love again and to float together in the warm, shimmering water of the underground lake, vowing to return to their special place as soon and as often as they could.

Memories of their wondrous first night together receded to a special place in her heart to be treasured forever, but the release of heat and passion they’d known continued to warm her. It had been so much more than an act of loving, sensual commitment. It had been the fulfillment of the promise and acknowledgement of the prophecy of all that was still to be theirs. In finally accepting the truth of their destiny, he had honored the commitment she’d long ago made to him and offered the same vow to her. They would have their happy life together.

An ominous word she tried not to conjure blended with the cooling water of the shower and began to numb her within and without. Someday…  She tried to force it away with the power of another…Now…but found herself lacking enough strength to support her heartfelt conviction. Shivering, she stepped onto the bathmat and wrapped her dripping hair in a towel. As she dried her trembling body with another, she heard the chimes of the anniversary clock in the living room and gasped to realize it was now seven-thirty.

Instantly she became a flurry of motion, applying make-up and blow-drying her hair before running into the bedroom to dress. Her movements were controlled and swift, and within minutes she was almost ready. As she checked her reflection in the full-length mirror, she could not ignore the dispirited dullness in her eyes and the downward turn of her mouth. She was an image of controlled despondency which the elegance of her black silk dress and simple gold jewelry could not offset.

She shrugged her shoulders, knowing she’d done the best she could, and tried to ignore the insistent wish she’d spent this time carefully, lovingly dressing to bring pleasure to Vincent, instead of creating an impressive appearance for people and purposes that no longer held much meaning in her life. She touched her fingers to the place where her heart beat, where his crystal should have rested, and closed her eyes for a moment as she turned away from her dismal reflection.

When she entered the living room, a gust of wind rattled the balcony doors and startled her from her dark reverie. She reached into the closet for a light coat, and her hand brushed against the jacket she’d work a few weeks earlier on the enchanted night they’d first made love. Again, her eyes glazed with unshed tears.

She shook her head hard, forcing herself to let those wondrous memories recede, then draped her coat over her shoulders and grabbed her purse. It was not yet eight o’clock. If the doorman was successful in hailing a cab for her the minute she reached the sidewalk, she might still make it to the reception more or less on time. She scrabbled her hand through the contents of her bag, then remembered how she had hurled her keys at one of the couches. Frowning in annoyance she burrowed her fingers under the cushions.

When she straightened, keys in hand, she noticed something she’d missed moments earlier – the relentless blinking of the phone’s light reminding her of the message she’d chosen to disregard. She was tempted to continue ignoring it, but its once maddening scarlet blaze altered as she stared at it, muting to a warm crimson glow that didn’t scream at her but instead seemed to call out a gentle request.

She was already late; she told herself to leave it all for later; but she tilted her head in unconscious imitation of Vincent’s appealing gesture, as a billow of warmth and love rushed through her, leaving her suffused with sweetness and strength. Rarely had she felt those sensations with such intensity and clarity. Why now, she asked herself, but she already knew the answer. He had sensed her discontent and hoped to soothe her with his love, offering her comfort and hope and something she could not quite define, a sense of purpose, an inexplicable stirring of possibility. In a heartbeat, every trial and setback of the whole maddening, disappointing day became a very small price to pay in exchange for his miraculous gift. While they would not be together as they’d wished this night, they’d proved once more they would never truly be apart.

This lightening of spirit, this renewal of faith made it easy to offer patience and kindness to others as well, even the intrusion of a phone message that would delay her arrival at the reception even further. Following the direction of her thoughts, she set her things aside and walked toward the phone. Smiling, she dropped onto the couch and watched the bright little light continue to wink at her.

“This had better not be you again, Joe,” she warned as she pressed the button and waited for the abandoned message to play. “If after all this, you’re saying you changed your mind and you’re going to –”

The answering machine beeped and the next sound she heard made her gasp and wonder at her sanity, for it belonged to a voice she could have never expected. The low, husky tones filled every space around and within her, holding her close in the speaker’s embrace.

“Catherine, I was wrong to answer your note as I did. I’ve tried so hard to keep from forcing you to choose between your world and mine, but sometimes through my fears I’ve denied you – denied us – the right to make any choices at all. I’ve taken from you the very freedom I’ve tried to protect…and I’ve taken us further from our dreams. I know it’s too late to change things for tonight, but if you were there in your home right now, I would talk with you about what has happened, and this time I would not pretend I don’t understand what you asked of me. My answer would be different than the one I gave you. I would tell you I’m not afraid to hear what’s in your heart…and to tell you what’s in mine.”

She froze in confusion and disbelief until the flare of a thousand questions burned through her. How did this happen? Where did he –? Her heart pounded as more compelling questions consumed her. Is it true? Is he finally ready to talk about all the things we’ve always avoided? Is it possible?

With a groan of pure regret, she realized, improbable as it seemed, it had been his call she had ignored less than an hour earlier. The anguish the realization brought was almost more than she could bear. “I didn’t know,” she whispered. “I couldn’t tell him. And now it’s happening again. It’s too late. It’s always too late!”

She leapt to her feet, desperate to do something, anything, to find some way to make things right. But she could see no direction and stood desolately staring at nothing at all. More chances lost, more opportunities missed, another link in the ominous chain of restrictions and regrets still holding them apart from one another. Now, just when he finally was willing to move forward, she was forced to remain beyond his reach.

She pressed the playback button, needing to hear again the promise in his words, longing to find a way to tell him how much she wanted to respond to each one. But the heartrending message was splintered by a sudden scraping sound from the terrace, as if the small wrought-iron bench had been pushed across the tiled floor. Her head snapped up, her entire body tensed, poised to react. Even as her mind told her it could not be, he had gone to tend to Sam Denton, he expected her to be out, she rushed toward the sound, knowing in her heart what she would find when she threw open the doors.

 “Vincent!” The sound of his name was the most beautiful music she had ever heard. She flew into his outstretched arms, trembling as they enfolded her in an embrace as powerful as it was tender. For long moments, they were content to simply hold one another close, accepting the unexpected, celebrating the special miracles of their bond, their love.

With a sigh, he slowly, gently, loosened their embrace and gazed into her eyes. “Catherine, I want to explain. I didn’t think you’d be here. I only thought I’d wait for you to return, that we might talk then.” He tilted his head toward the phone across the room. “You listened to my message.”

“Yes, but when I heard it, it was too late.” She tightened her grip on his arms. “I wanted to go back in time, to change things. But now you’re here. Now I can tell you –”

He shook his head. “No. It’s not possible. I’m keeping you from your responsibilities. You must leave now. I’m sorry, I –”

Not again, she vowed silently. Never again! She pressed her fingers to his lips and silenced his racing words. For just a moment she felt the stirring pressure of his mouth in a gentle, unguarded kiss that made her entire body tremble. She paused, unwilling to surrender even this small pleasure. But when he stilled the softly seductive motion, she began to speak the truth they both needed to hear.

“No more excuses, Vincent, no more reasons that no longer make sense. In your message you told me you’re ready to talk about issues we’ve never been able to face.” She waited for him to avert his eyes, to slowly withdraw further from their embrace, but when he did neither, her heart sang with hope. “Is it true? Are you ready?”

He nodded, his gaze never leaving hers, an unspoken commitment in his silence.

“I’m ready, too.” An irrepressible smile began to soften her mouth. “And I think we should begin with what happened to our plans for tonight. It was wrong of me to say what I did in that note. I should have made my own decision – the right decision. I should have followed my heart, not given in to the demands of others.”

At the sound of those familiar words, the shimmer of his smile reflected hers for a heartbeat, then his lips tightened. “But you couldn’t. Not when I’ve done everything to make it impossible, when I again let my fears deny we both want. I know you were only agreeing with what I’d convinced myself was best for both of us…what I forced you to believe, too.”

She sighed softly. “Maybe, but as of tonight that’s all in the past.” Her smile began to glow, easing the tension in her face and voice. “Now we can look forward to something much better –  spending as much time as we need for me to convince you that you were right to change your mind.”

He wanted to believe he’d been granted another miracle. “But how can you forgive me so easily?”

“Because we can forgive each other. We’re equally to blame for all of this, Vincent, but now we need to let it go so we can move on together with our lives just as we want them to be.”

“Yes…” He breathed a vow in the single word. “Catherine, I meant everything I said when I called you from Sam’s apartment. It might be too late for tonight, but –”

“No, it’s not too late! It’s never too late for what’s meant to be.” She raised her hands to stroke the angled planes of his face, her caress both sensual and soothing. She let her fingertips glide again across his mouth, encouraging his response with touch to underscore sound. “You promised you wouldn’t be afraid to listen to my heart. You said you’d face the truth about what happened tonight, and this time your reply would be different.”

When she saw him nod quickly, she felt her smile glow. “I want nothing more than to be with you tonight, to let nothing in my world or yours come between us. To finish what we’ve begun and move on to where we want to be. I believe with all my heart that this is what you want, too, but I need to hear you say it.” She looked into his eyes. “Say it, Vincent, for both of us.”

There was nothing left in him to resist her or himself, and he wished he never had. “What I want is to ignore everything that tries to force us apart. Not just tonight but always. I want you to be with me. I want us to leave all our uncertainties and fears behind forever. And I want tonight to carry us past our beginning and embrace everything that we know is waiting for us.”

The smoky rasp of his voice held no hint of hesitation or doubt, and she was filled with more happiness than she had ever known. She wanted to tell him what his pledge meant to her, how he continued to change her life for the better, forever, but when he took a deep breath, she just waited for him to go on.

“I have been wrong to make decisions for both of us, to take away your right to choose, especially when those choices were never what either of us wanted. We are meant to be together. What we have means more than anything else.” His eyes glistened with unshed tears as he smiled at her. “The life we will share begins now.”

Her sigh of joyful relief was a breathy, beautiful sound, an accompaniment to the sweet ferocity of her embrace as she buried her face in the curve of his neck. She pressed heated, healing kisses there as his arms held her tighter, and they gave to one another the moment of affirmation they both so needed.

He raised one hand to stroke the smoothness of her hair, entwining his fingers in its satiny strands. Then, he eased her head back so that he might gaze into her eyes before lowering his mouth to hers in a kiss full of tenderness and promise. He knew how close they had come to losing everything, to surrendering to a slow, unstoppable erosion of every dream they shared.

But perhaps this was what it had taken to make him listen at last to the voice of her heart, to accept and embrace everything they longed to give each other. To move on from cherished possibilities to the wondrous reality all their years together would be.

With a soft mingling of sighs, they slowly eased apart. As he held her hands gently in his, he wondered if he’d ever stop smiling. “So, what next?”

She grinned up at him. “I have a good idea! If we leave right now, we’ll still be able to hear the second half of the concert.”

“That is a brilliant idea.” He tilted his head toward the phone. “But what about the reception? Do you have to tell someone you won’t be there?”

She laughed out loud. “Yes! I can’t wait to do it, and after that we’ll be entirely free to go.”

“If you talk quickly, we’ll be in time for the third concerto.” He took her hand as they walked together toward the phone.

“Your favorite.” She squeezed his hand tighter. “And then after the concert…”

“It will be quite late.” With the seductive half-smile she so adored, he continued, “And it’s Friday. You won’t have to work tomorrow. Perhaps you should think about staying Below tonight. Maybe for the whole weekend…”

On tiptoe, she leaned closer and whispered her response in his ear, caressing him with the warmth of her breathy words. “Oh, I don’t have to think about it…not for a single second…” She leaned away playfully and added, “But you were right. There’s still something I need to do. It will only take a minute.”

She released his hand and picked up the receiver, then, winking at him, she clicked the button for speaker phone.

“Joe? Yes, I’m calling from home, and yes I know how late it is, but it doesn’t really matter because I’m not going to the reception…Don’t start with me, Joe. You said it wasn’t even that important. You were happy to drop it for a baseball game. And what I have planned for tonight is far more…appealing…than that.” She looked at Vincent as he raised his eyebrows but didn’t attempt to subdue his smirk at the strident sound of Joe’s sputtering protests.

“Yes, I know I could still get there if I tried, but it’s not going to happen. This is simply not up for further negotiation.” She grinned at Vincent and delivered her final argument. “You know, if you leave right now, you’ll probably miss cocktails and dinner, but you’ll still be in time for the mayor’s speech.” She tried her best to stifle a giggle. “So have fun, and you can tell me all about it on Monday. Oh, and I might be a little late…”

She dropped the receiver back into its place with a satisfyingly decisive clatter, then focused on Vincent. Their shared smiles warmed their hearts. “Okay, let’s go! Oh, wait, just one more thing…”

He tilted his head and waited for her to continue. “What is it, Catherine?”

“Your phone call – how did you manage it? If I had dreamed for a second I’d hear your voice, I would have answered it immediately!”

He grinned at her, enjoying her puzzled expression. “I was still at Sam’s apartment, and I wanted to get a note to you, but there wasn’t time for that. So…”

She grinned back. “So you decided desperate times called for desperate measures?”

“You might say that, but while using a phone isn’t something I’ve often done, it’s not unknown for anyone living Below to find a way to make use of one in an emergency.” He couldn’t resist cupping her face with his hands, holding a treasure he vowed he’d never lose. “And I think we both agree this qualified as an emergency.”

She snuggled into his gentle grasp, then turned her face to press a kiss to each palm. The brush of her lips tickled his skin, and he tilted her head up so they could gaze into each other’s eyes.

“Oh, we can definitely agree on that.” She let her gaze wander the length of his body, pausing every now and then before returning to his eyes. “And on a few other urgent issues which need…addressing…as soon as possible.”

Her delighted laugh enchanted him and his heart raced as he savored the meaning in her playful words. For the first time tonight his eloquence eluded him, but he was certain she still got his message.

“I’ll meet you Below,” she promised, her pleasure in those simple but portentous words racing like wildfire along the heated channel of their bond.

It was all he could do to resist taking her in his arms again to begin the rest of their evening that very moment. “And I will wait for you, Catherine. I will always be there for you.”

She paused only long enough to secure the balcony doors behind him, then raced out of the apartment. “And someday, Vincent, someday soon,” she murmured, knowing he would hear every word in his heart, “we’ll find a way to leave all the waiting behind. We’ll change always to forever.”